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Congress GOP

Chelsea Handler Lays A Brutal Smackdown On Marjorie ‘Moron’ Greene: ‘Go Work At Foot Locker, B*tch!’

Comedian Chelsea Handler is guest hosting “The Daily Show” this week, and she had some free advice for Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-GA), who recently whined about how “miserable” it is to be a member of Congress.

Last Friday, Greene told Glenn Greenwald on his System Update podcast:

“The nature of this job. It keeps members of Congress and Senators in Washington so much of the time — too much of the time to be honest with you, that we don’t get to go home and spend more time with our families, our friends, and, you know, all in our district or maybe just be regular people because this job is so demanding and it’s turned into practically year-round.

“Becoming a member of Congress has made my life miserable. I made a lot more money before I got here. I’ve lost money since I’ve gotten here. I have people come up to me and say crazy things to me out of the blue in public places that they believe cause they read it on the internet or saw it on some news show about me. So it’s not a life that I think is like something that I enjoy because I don’t enjoy it.”

That led Handler to verbally excoriate Greene:

“Marjorie Taylor Greene, aka capital storming Barbie, hates her job, which is so funny because the rest of us also hate her having her job.

As for Greene suggesting that she just wants to be a “regular person,” Handler noted:

“First of all, you’re not a regular person, you moron. You’re a congressperson because you campaigned and somehow won, which requires you to work year-round. I also don’t wanna work year-round, and that’s why I don’t!”

The comedian then offered some free advice to the Georgia Republican:

“To quote Kim K for a second, ‘Get your f*cking ass up and work! The point is, if you don’t like being in Congress, then go work at Foot Locker, bitch!”

Categories
GOP Joe Biden Religion WTF?!

Lauren Boebert Urges Christians To Pray For Joe Biden’s Death

It’s been imminently clear for some time now that Rep. Lauren Boebert (R-CO) is one of the dumbest, meanest, and most deplorable human beings currently slithering across the face of the planet.

After all, Boebert has repeatedly attacked LGBTQ Americans, hurled insults at both her Democratic and Republican colleagues in Congress, spread bogus conspiracy theories, and even managed to alienate people she once claimed were friends.

And now we have Boebert on the record urging so-called “Christians” to pray for the immediate death of President Joe Biden.

Patriot Takes shared a video of Boebert remarking:

“We pray for our president. Let his days be few and another take his office. That’s why I filed the articles of impeachment for Joe Biden. Unfortunately, he does have a really good insurance policy named Kamala Harris.”

Boebert is directly referencing a verse from the Bible, a book which she either didn’t read or didn’t fully understand. It’s Psalm 109:8, and it reads:

“Let his days be few; and let another take his office.”

People who are actually Christians (i.e. Pope Francis, former president Jimmy Carter) don’t wish such hateful shit on others. It’s not what Christ taught. Instead, Jesus said:

“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.” (Mark 12: 30-31)

Of course, Boebert doesn’t bother to do as Christ’s teachings tell her to. That’s because she’s a fake Christian who thinks hatred is good and anyone different than her is evil.

The congresswoman got reminded of her faux Christianity on Twitter, where users lit her up for being a disgusting piece of human excrement.

But perhaps it was Mahatma Gandhi who said it best:

Categories
Barack Obama Elections GOP WTF?!

Cruz Claims He Can Tell Buttigieg Is Running In 2024 Because He’s ‘Mimicking Obama’s Cadence’

Texas GOP Senator Ted Cruz is convinced that Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg will challenge President Joe Biden for the 2024 Democratic presidential nomination.

Why would Cruz say such a thing? According to him, it’s because Buttigieg has recently been “mimicking” former President Barack Obama’s “cadence” when he speaks.

In a podcast recorded on Sunday, Cruz told his co-host regarding comments Buttigieg made about the Chinese spy balloon:

“Just something I noticed listening to that — did you pick up on Buttigieg’s cadence? He is mimicking Barack Obama.”

Cruz added:

“He’s doing this speed up and pause; speed up and pause. And Buttigieg didn’t use to speak that way. I think he’s getting ambitions of 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. And there’s no real mystery about that. But it is a little amazing, given the train wreck he’s presided over at the Department of Transportation for two years, that his ambitions have soared so high.”

David Edwards · Ted Cruz opines on Buttigieg’s cadance ‘mimmicking Barack Obama’

Of course, Ted is also planning to run for president in 2024, and he’s trying to get ahead of his potential rivals if he should happen to win the GOP presidential nomination, which he won’t. Cruz has tried his hand atwinning a nomination to be president, and he failed spectacularly, winding up kissing Donald Trump’s ass even though Trump insulted both his father and his wife.

Sounds like Cruz is still upset at a burn Buttigieg laid on him in June of last year, shortly after the mass shooting at a school in Uvalde, Texas that killed 19 children and two teachers.

When asked about the horrific shooting, Cruz suggested that schools would be safer if they had “one door into and out of the school, which led Buttigieg to retort:

“The idea that us being the only developed country where this happens routinely — especially in terms of the mass shootings — is somehow a result of the design of the doorways on our school buildings is the definition of insanity, if not the definition of denial.”

Categories
China Donald Trump The Trump Adminstration

3 Chinese Spy Balloons Floated Over The US While Trump Was POTUS: Report

Over the past 48 hours, several Republicans have insisted that had a Chinese spy balloon been spotted over the United States while failed ex-president Donald Trump was still in office, the object would have immediately been shot down.

Take, for example, Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (R-GA), who made such a claim Saturday on Twitter.

“I just spoke with our GREAT America First President Trump.

“He would have never allowed China to fly a spy balloon over our country and our military bases and assets.

“Pres Trump would have shot it down before it entered the US.

“And so would I.”

And Trump himself also weighed on the matter, posting on his failing Truth Social site, “”SHOOT DOWN THE BALLOON!”

However, thanks to reporting from Forbes, we now know that at least three Chinese spy balloons floated over the U.S. while Trump was in office:

Talking heads on cable TV are up in arms about the Chinese spy balloon that was floating across the continental U.S., before it was shot down Saturday afternoon. Conservative commentators have insisted President Joe Biden should’ve ordered the balloon be shot down earlier and that a foreign balloon flying over U.S. territory never would’ve happened under President Donald Trump. But it did happen under Trump, according to several new reports.

Bloomberg confirmed that report, noting:

“The balloon spotted this week over Montana was not the first time the U.S. has detected Chinese balloons over their territory—with previous incursions occurring during the Trump Administration.”

The Associated Press even got a defense expert to explain that such flyovers are not uncommon.

Craig Singleton, a senior fellow at the Foundation for the Defense of Democracies, said Chinese surveillance balloons have been sighted on numerous occasions over the past five years in different parts of the Pacific, including near sensitive U.S. military installations in Hawaii.

President Biden has been in office for two years, leaving three years of Trump’s presidency in that window of five years.

So when can we expect an apology from Greene, Trump, and other Republicans? Never. Because they can never ever admit that they’re wrong, even though they’re wrong 99.9% of the time and pathetic hypocrites 100% of the tine.

 

Categories
China Social Media WTF?!

Randy Quaid’s Reaction To The Chinese Balloon Is So Strange That Twitter Users Can’t Stop Laughing

Granted, we’ve known for quite some time now that actor Randy Quaid had jumped the shark and taken to inhabiting the dark world of internet conspiracy theories and other assorted craziness that hides in plain sight in some of the more untraveled corners of social media.

For example, consider this from a profile of Quaid published by Uproxx back in 2014:

Randy and Evi Quaid reportedly believe there is an evil sect of Hollywood trying to kill them. It is the same shadowy organization that killed Heath Ledger, David Carradine, and Chris Penn. This sect is also responsible for extorting millions from their bank accounts, while running them out of the country.

The impetus for the seemingly paranoid descent into madness has several starting points depending on who you ask. Friends and relatives point to the 1989 marriage of the Quaids as the beginning of the end for the Golden Globe winning actor. Others say it manifested back in 2006, when they were approached by law enforcement for disturbing the peace (more on that later). Perhaps, it was when the world became aware of their self-destruction, when Randy was blackballed from a would-be Broadway play for allegedly verbally and physically attacking cast members, among other undignified behaviors reported by those on hand.

Fast forward to today, and feast your eyes on Quaid’s non-sequitur take on the Chinese spy balloon which was downed this afternoon on the orders of President Joe Biden. Hours prior to that action, Quaid tweeted out:

What in the hell does that even mean?! Is it supposed to be humorous, or is he serious? It’s difficult to tell when dealing with the mentally ill.

But we did get something good out of Randy’s bizarro tweet: Social media reaction that is absolutely priceless.