GOP U.S. Senate

Ted Cruz Gets Trolled To His Face In The Most Hilarious (And Humiliating) Way Possible

As much as he loves to take cheap shots at people on social media, you’d think Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX) would have developed an appreciation for those who manage to turn the tables and pull a good joke on him.

But, alas, Teddy doesn’t have much of a sense of humor, especially when it comes to the self-deprecating kind, and he winds up looking like the odd man out whenever someone trolls him.

Cruz was pranked by two guys who call themselves The Good Liars and love to pull pranks on political figures which they make a video of and then share on Twitter.

According to HuffPost, The Good Liars had the perfect plan, and they carried it out to perfection:

A prankster duo known as The Good Liars asked the lawmaker for an autograph. He appeared ready to comply until he got a closer look at what he was expected to sign.

It was a copy of a National Enquirer cover story linking Cruz’s father, Rafael Cruz, to the assassination of President John F. Kennedy, something then-rival Donald Trump used against him on the campaign trail.

There’s a story behind that National Enquirer cover, too: According to former Trump personal attorney Michael Cohen, Donald Trump personally approved the story, which was then published by his close friend, David Pecker.

It should be noted, however, that the Texas senator did manage to bestow a compliment on The Good Liars, telling them he’d seen their “silly videos.” That remark delighted the two pranksters.

A week ago, Cruz managed to own himself when he told reporters that he didn’t understand Republicans who suck up to Trump:

Just once, I’d love to see a Republican candidate stand up in a primary and say, “I am a moderate, establishment squish. I stand for absolutely nothing.” It would be refreshingly honest at least. But nobody says that.

And by the way, they all pledge their love for Donald Trump. “I love Donald Trump.” “No, no. I love Donald Trump more.” “No, no, I have Donald Trump tattooed on my rear end.”

When it comes to a complete lack of self-awareness, Ted Cruz is in a category of his own.

Elections GOP U.S. Senate

Ted Cruz FINALLY Facing Disbarment For His Role In Attempting To Overturn The 2020 Election

Could the tide finally be turning? Could the members of Congress who took part in an insurrection and attempted coup after the 2020 presidential election be on the verge of having to pay a price for their actions?

Based on a report from The New York Times, the answer appears to be yes as a new ethics complaint filed against Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX) seeks to have him disbarred for the role he played in trying to keep Donald Trump in the White House.

The complaint against Mr. Cruz, filed by a group called the 65 Project, focuses on baseless assertions by Mr. Cruz about widespread voting fraud in the weeks between Election Day in 2020 and Jan. 6, 2021, as well as his participation in lawsuits protesting the results in Pennsylvania.

The complaint directly references the disbarment of Trump’s former personal attorney, Rudy Giuliani:

“Just as Mr. Giuliani has been disciplined for his conduct, so should Mr. Cruz.”

Mention is also made in the complaint to a case brought against “coup memo” author John Eastman, who also served as an attorney to Trump during his legal efforts to overturn the 2020 election:

“In many respects, the question of whether Mr. Cruz aided criminal or fraudulent efforts as already been answered affirmatively by a federal court.

“Mr. Cruz chose to offer his professional license to Mr. Trump’s arsenal during the latter’s assault on our democracy. He cannot be shielded from the consequences of that decision simply because, unlike Mr. Trump’s other attorneys, he happens to hold high public office. For the reasons set forth above, we respectfully request that the Office of Chief Disciplinary Counsel investigate Mr. Cruz’s conduct and impose appropriate discipline.”

The other role Cruz played in the attempt to keep President Joe Biden from being certified as the winner of the election was when he formally objected (along with Missouri Republican Sen. Josh Hawley) to the electoral vote totals being counted during a joint session of Congress on January 6, 2021.

The House Select Committee on the Capitol insurrection may also present evidence of Cruz’s role in the riots which took place on that fateful day which left five people dead, including a criminal referral to the Justice Department if it can be proven that Cruz and other members of Congress violated federal law and their oaths of office. The panel will hold public hearings beginning in June.

Foreign Policy GOP U.S. Senate WTF?!

Rand Paul Says He Won’t Help Ukraine Until Funds For ‘Sexually Promiscuous’ Quails Are Cut From The Budget

Kentucky Sen. Rand Paul (R) continues to hold up a $40 billion aid package to our Ukrainian allies because he claims the federal budget already contains too much waste.

According to Mediaite, Paul suggested on Tuesday that birds on cocaine were his biggest concern:

“If the defense of Ukraine is really in our national security interests, shouldn’t the gift come from our military budget?” Paul asked. “What about cutting wasteful spending? My office cataloged over $50 billion in waste.”

Paul referenced several unusual spending items, including money to fund studies on selfies, Panamanian frogs, and sneezing in cafeterias. Then came the crème de la crème.

“Couldn’t we maybe cut the money spent on Japanese quail studying whether or not they’re more sexually promiscuous or not when you give them cocaine?” he asked.

And this isn’t the first time Sen. Paul has brought up cokehead quails as a reason to not fund necessary priorities like U.S. national security. He did the same thing in 2018, the Washington Post reports:

You can look up data on NIH grants. This particular research was called “Enhancement of Sexual Motivation” and it did, in fact, receive $873,503 from the agency over the course of its progress. But that funding ended more than five years ago. It ended before Paul raised it in 2018.”

Here’s the video of Paul’s 2018 coke-quail rant:

It should also be noted that the study cited by Paul actually has practical applications in humans, as Scientific American has explained:

“There is already an extensive literature on drugs like cocaine, how it impacts various behaviors and how it acts in, and changes, the brains. But we don’t know everything by any means, and we certainly don’t know enough about mechanism to treat cocaine addiction effectively. Studies to understand how cocaine impacts every behavior are important to our understanding of the drug and how we can combat its effects.”

Supposedly, Rand Paul is a doctor. But he sounds more like a coke-addled strutting rooster. Then again, at least a rooster serves some purpose, unlike the junior senator from the Blue Grass State.

Foreign Policy GOP U.S. Senate

McConnell Slams Rand Paul For Holding Up Aid To Ukraine After Meeting With Zelensky

Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-KY) is not happy with the junior GOP senator from his state, Rand Paul, and remarks he made after returning from Ukraine and meeting with Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky made that crystal clear.

Burgess Everett of Politico notes that McConnell is trying to make sure Republicans such as Paul don’t stray too far away from the GOP fold:

“It’s Mitch McConnell vs. MAGA when it comes to Ukraine. At least a half-dozen Republican senators are expected to oppose the aid bill, according to one Republican senator. And in private meetings, an increasing number of GOP senators have questioned various aspects of the request.”

Earlier this week, Paul single-handedly held up a $40 billion aid package to Ukraine right as they seem to be turning the tide against Russia and Vladimir Putin, who is reportedly about to undergo surgery for what has been described as “blood cancer.”

McConnell had this to say about aid to Ukraine:

“It’s in America’s interest to do this. This is not a charity we’re involved in here. It’s in our interests to help Ukrainians just like it’s in the interest of NATO countries. So this is not some handout.”

Asked about Paul’s opposition to the aid package, McConnell quickly asserted his primacy over Senate Republicans, adding what certainly sounded like a jab at his colleague:

“Well, it’s no secret. Rand and I have a different world view of the importance of Americans’ role around the world. So that was not surprising. And it won’t create a problem. We’ll get the job done by Wednesday.”

Did you hear that, Rand? It’s a done deal, and you’d best start doing as you’re told by the head of your Senate caucus. If not, don’t expect any favors in the future.

Don’t be surprised if the aid package passes first thing Monday morning with Rand Paul’s full support.

GOP Russia U.S. Senate Vladimir Putin

Resurfaced Video Shows John McCain Accusing Rand Paul Of ‘Working For Vladimir Putin’

On Thursday, a $39.8 billion package of aid for Ukraine was blocked in the U.S. Senate by Sen. Rand Paul (R-KY).

Why did Paul block the bill? Well, here’s what he offered as his explanation:

The senator faced backlash over his opposition but said he stands by his decision. “My oath of office is to the U.S. Constitution, not to any foreign nation,” Paul tweeted Thursday evening, repeating his remarks on the Senate floor. While he said he sympathizes with the Ukrainian people, Paul added that the United States “cannot continue to spend money we don’t have” because doing so is “threatening our own national security.”

The fact that Paul is the only U.S. senator to take such a ridiculous stance at a time when Ukraine is beating back Russian troops led to a deep dive into the video vault and the resurfacing of a clip of the late Sen. John McCain (R-AZ) accusing Paul of “working for Vladimir Putin” in 2017, according to Newsweek:

“So I repeat again – the senator from Kentucky is now working for Vladimir Putin,” the late senator said in the short video.

In the clip, McCain was discussing NATO membership for the Balkan nation of Montenegro. Paul had blocked a vote to ratify a treaty that would have allowed Montenegro to join the U.S.-led military alliance by refusing to agree to unanimous consent.

That led Paul to fire back at McCain a day later:

 “You know, I think he makes a really, really strong case for term limits. I think maybe he’s past his prime; I think maybe he’s gotten a little bit unhinged.”

Five years later, Rand Paul is still Putin’s favorite senator, and his grandstanding could well result in the deaths of more people in the besieged nation of Ukraine. The Kentucky Republican needs to get his head out of his ass and support our Ukrainian allies.